The Need of Certainty
Updated: Jan 19, 2021
Humans need certainty! Certainty: something that cannot be doubted. A truth, a feeling, or a belief. Since I've been following Tony Robbins, I've had the opportunity to learn more about each human need and how we meet them in a healthy or unhealthy way.
We all have the need for certainty for some people this is the most important need. If you find yourself having a routine structure for each day and something changes that routine what's your reaction? If your reaction is anger, frustration or something negative your need for certainty is probably the most important need you have. Our reaction to situations gives us clues as to what's most important to us. When your needs are so important you start having anger or resentment towards someone it's time to reevaluate how to meet your needs in a healthy way.
People will do horrific criminal acts to have their needs met. Risking getting sent to jail, loosing loved ones or the risk of public shame. You might ask yourself "how could anyone do ___?" the answer is they weren't getting their needs met. Why do addicts continue to use? They are certain they know what will happen when they do. Why does an athlete get up at 5 AM starting their long day early? They are certain of the benefits.
At work this manifest in different ways; having a set schedule, a monthly meeting, process that don't change. Things you can be certain of that you have learned to depend on.
In relationships this can manifest in who does certain chores, following through with your word, a set schedule like having a family fun night every Friday or certain holiday traditions we look forward to.
You can create healthy ways of getting your need for certainty met by creating a morning routine within your control. Fitness, journaling, reading a book, what is something within yourself - without being dependent on someone - you can be certain of?
Stay tuned as I talk about all 6 human needs in future posts.